Unhinged

One of my favorite spirit animals is an unhinged artist. People who let the message come through them unaltered. Raw. And part of the message is their life itself. They live so freely and boldly and inspire liberation in others. I think of ancestors James Baldwin, Nina Simone, Maya Angelou, and Toni Morrison. I think of my aunties, who speak what comes to their minds. The hip hop artists of our time that didn’t shy away from truth telling as the soul of their craft. And I wonder how things would be if we were all a little more liberated-in a revolutionary mindset, of course.

I attended a Christian grad school and there was always this lady present at events. She worked at the school and considered herself an integral part of our experience. She would pull me to the side and say, “I follow you on the socials, be careful what you post. I am watching you.” I grew more disgusted each time she delivered the threat. I became so immensely aware of the box that she had put me in.. .the performative boxes that I’d allowed everyone to put me into time after time.

I became indignant in my retorts and resolved to be as witty, bold, and flexible with my words. Now that I am deconstructed, I definitely put all that monitoring shit to rest. What was worse in looking back, is that people didn’t have to work too hard. They got into my head, my psyche and I usually did the editing myself. I stopped myself short of a lot of the expression because I took everyone into account each time I spoke, write, performed, expressed. But now I was liberated. Because why the fuck not? I don’t believe that I came into this existence to be sweet and pliable. And despite my warm yet regal reputation, I am called to shake shit up. Rip up the boxes. To go beyond the curated edition of life as we know it and to reach into the most liberated possibility. Oh Theo, continue to trash the edits. Live free and untethered. Express your being exactly as you want to express it. They have no claim, no right to your truest most Divine process. . .with all that is within you, express!